The Liver Gains the Upper Hand

It would happen that, during the outward course of worldly contingencies, the inward matters of the system and its concerns would come to the fore. For it now occurs to me that my liver, it bordering on a kind of consciousness in its own right, has poised itself for a larger role. But a statement such as this surely begs for elaboration.

For years now I have suffered with the royal pain in the big toe that arises when ones' eating habits are an order too rich. And you see, the liver, not being located too far from the solar plexus, the largest neural ganglion save the brain, is involved in balancing such matters. Providence shows us that this solar plexus is particularly well developed in gourmets and alcoholics, acting as a seat of consciousness for the liver.

I'm pretty sure though that yesterday was the first time my liver ever made a telephone call. It called somebody in India. I have the number on my cell phone, and the call lasted 22 minutes.